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This will be my last post here as an aspiring actor. The next time I write shall be after “Sikandar” has released and all the reactions are in and the weekend over and done with and my life altered forever. I wonder how I’ll deal with the anticlimactic Saturday morning. Because it’s always an anticlimax, isn’t it? The axis mundi of the world hasn’t suddenly shifted to make me the center of the world, Aphrodite’s handmaidens aren’t hidden in the billowing curtains of my bedchamber, the song “Crawl” by Kings of Leon doesn’t play out loud everytime I walk into a room in fantastic slow motion.
But for all the banality of that Saturday morning, for all that the coffee will taste the same, and the number of times I hit the snooze button on my alarm will be the same, and that old familiar series of twinges that run down my body reminding me of all the bones I’ve sprained/strained/broken, I will have been projected onto a widescreen in cinematic technicolor for the first time in front of a paying audience. I will have achieved the thing I have desired most in my life, and I’m a little moist in the corners of my eyes just thinking about that.
I honestly wondered whether this week would ever come. I think of all the times I walked out of an audition with the callous insults of the auditioners still heaving against my breast, I think of all the ten thousand lonely nights I’ve spent in tiny little apartments whispering to the gods, begging for a sign, an intervention, a bigger ration of faith, I think of all the times I had to hide the pain in my voice during the weekly calls my parents made to check up on their only son, stumbling around in a city more than a thousand miles away, and for the first time in my life - I feel a deep and satisfying sense of accomplishment.
I cannot say whether people will like my work or not. I cannot know whether “Sikandar” will capture your minds and your hearts like Piyush hopes it will.
All I do know, is that I’m here to stay now. I’m here to work. I’m here to give this profession every single shred of me in the hopes of becoming a worthy actor. The first step shall be before your eyes the day-after tomorrow. Thank you, to all of you who have been reading and responding to my blog. Know that I shall not be disappearing after “Sikandar”. This may have started as ‘their’ idea, but this is MY blog now. I plan to keep posting my incoherent, inconsistent, incomparable thoughts here until BIG has no choice but to cut me off.
The premiere of the film is tomorrow. I’ve got a killer suit, an admantine will, and a smile the likes of which these here actresses haven’t seen in a long while. Like a rapper said - “Blind eyes can look at me and see the Truth.” Hello, world, I’m Arunoday, I hear you’ve been waiting for me…
GOOD LUCK! I hope it goes well!! Cant wait to see your first post after the release.
[ REPORT ABUSE ]yup…we’ve been waiting….hope the film has a good run…..break a leg!
[ REPORT ABUSE ]..read the reviews of Sikandar..impressive..i dnt knw whether it will be shown in london…if it is…will surely try to catch up
[ REPORT ABUSE ]All the best Arunji… and yes, please don’t stop blogging… I log in every morning before I start my work just to read your posts…
[ REPORT ABUSE ]wow, so did you even bother understanding that there is a difference between stage acting and film acting? i guess you were lucky that you were not in non pseudo hindi film, and died in the movie. prevented the critics from ripping your ”lovely” performance to shreds.
[ REPORT ABUSE ]hi….
[ REPORT ABUSE ]saw the movie…..real gud work n as you said,“Blind eyes can look at me and see the Truth.” The truth is you were awesome,no matter its a hit or not but your work will always remain immortal.Keep up the good work…All the people in your native place are really proud…wht else you need!!
Hi Arun,
[ REPORT ABUSE ]I saw the movie, and it was nice. and your role really deserves a special mention. Even Nikhat Kazami, in her review of your movie, has appreciated your performance. I m sure that more directors will also like it and will offer you more roles.
By the way which is your next movie?
i m eagerly waiting
hi back again,aisaa ho sakta hai kya ki aap likhe aur hum padhe/comment nahi kare…its ur style that makes me come back…the shyness draped in arrogance,the devil may care attitude veiled in a please have a look plea….I just love it all cos I’m a diehard fan of your blogs.The only person who blogs better is BIG B.
[ REPORT ABUSE ]sadly the turnout on the first day was ony 10% to 20% according to the reports. it doesn’t look good my friend
[ REPORT ABUSE ]One man carried Sikander.
Guess who?
I would have left it at that but in the unlikely event it leaves you mired in suspense, it was you.
[ REPORT ABUSE ]The movie was an admirable effort but unfortunately the other characters were unable to hold their own, your too-short performance was the crowning glory.
The part where you talk about your ’struggling’ days is so touching.
I think you were absolutely brilliant in ‘Sikander’. All your scenes were really well executed. I couldn’t help but gasp.
I’m sure this is the start of a very fulfilling career. Wish you all the very best
[ REPORT ABUSE ]