despo dude

- Sometimes to show girls I am sensitive, I am crying when watching sad or romantic movies.
- If I like a girl I am seeing anywhere then I take her picture so I can look at her whenever I am wanting.
- There is cute and sexy nurse at children’s hospital and I am volunteering over there just to patio her.
- I am standing outside girl’s schools and colleges’ everyday at break time to ask these girls out.
- I am only taking membership to unisex gyms for work out. I like to see girls get all hot and sweaty.
- Girls are liking it when boys are following them wherever they are going. It makes them feel special.
- My opening line to girls are ‘So what’s your hobby? Mine’s falling in love’.
- Girls are liking guys who are sensitive so I am carrying a teddy bear everywhere I am going.
- My favourite movie – DDLJ. Everybody I say I look like Raj. Now I am only looking for my Simran.
- I like fast everything, fast cars, fast girls and fast love!

This one time I am dialing wrong number but when I hear girl on other line with sexy voice I try and make the conversation with her. But she is getting angry and is also turning out to be daughter of ACP so I am little bit screwed.

When I go on date with girls then I am always taking care of the bill because I am hoping that they will be taking care of me later on in the night

There is no one in this world as cool as me. Girls should be happy I am taking time out to woo them.

When I take girls out to long drive, I purposely shut my car off on lonely highway and tell to them that there is no petrol in my car.

If I ask girl to go camping I tell them that I have only 1 sleeping bag.

I like to surf Internet for cool pickup lines to use on girls I meet. They work man!

If you buy girls presents then they have to say yes to everything you ask them to do.

Puppies are HUGE chick magnets. Take a puppy out for a walk and girls surround you to pet your puppy and if you’re lucky maybe more.

I like to watch all girl life guards in Baywatch. I especially like it when the run on beach and give mouth to mouth.

People are saying I am shallow but that’s not true. I am wanting to know girls from outside and inside also.

I love you always, forever, until eternity.

DIRECTORY DESPO

My favourite song is “Choli Ke Peeche Kya Hai’ and ‘I Like Big Butts and I Cannot lie’. Very meaningful lyrics.

Girls, if I am staring at your chest I am only appreciating what god is being generous and giving to you.

Girls you must feel honoured that I am bestowing attention on you. I usually spend my time only with special people.

It’s ok if you have boyfriend, husband or even baby. I am very easy-going like that.

Definition of HAUNTY– A Hot Aunty

My favourite comic book is Savita Bhabhi

I am thinking of myself as a metrosexual. I live in a metro and I am very very sexual

Girls when you say you are tied up, do you mean with handcuffs?

I am deciding to try and say sorry for Priya once again. So I am going to Gullu’s building and again sending sorry note and one rose with Gullu’s brother, Raju to Priya’s house. But when he is coming back, he is telling she is tearing my sorry letter and throwing the flower in dustbin. He gives for me the pieces of my sorry letter. I am so sad and I am not knowing what to do. I am talking to Gullu and he tells she will come down in some time as she is going for classes at 5.00 pm. So I wait around and decide that when I see her, I will beg for her forgiveness and tell for her what had happened. But when I am seeing her and going to tell for her sorry, before that only she is giving me one tight slap. And saying you bloody rascal, don’t ever talk for me again or I am calling for my father and telling him to put you in jail. Gullu is also telling me to go home now, so I go away.

My love story has got over even before started. What a sad thing, I am losing only girl who is liking me. My sapnon ki raani has gone forever.

You know I have already got my first audition, it is for underwear brand. When I am telling mummjii, she is shocked and tells beta how can u only wear underwear and come on the TV. But I am telling for her don’t worry; even big stars are doing ads like this. And when all will see me on TV, then I will be famous and get many girls. So I dress my best and go for the audition screening. Mummiji is also gone to temple to pray that I get this ad.

When I enter the studio, there are many guys waiting over there who are also coming for audition. Some are looking ok, but me DJ is always looking the best. I sit on sofa and wait for receptionist to call my name. Another boy is also sitting on the sofa. He is coming little close and asking me what is my name and if I am coming for audition, I say yes. Then he is talking to me about how he has done so many ads and can get me some ads also. He tells why we don’t meet for coffee. I am thinking why he is asking like date? But I want to do the ads, so I say ok and give for him my number. Then receptionist calling his name and he goes in. Then another boy is coming near my side and talking to me, he asks if I know about the boy who has just gone in. I am telling no, then he is telling me that the boy who was just talking to me is gay. Arre baba, I am so shocked. I am baba not like that, I like for girls and now I am very worried and nervous that so many gay boys are around me.

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Hello all

You know I have already got my first audition, it is for underwear brand. When I am telling mummjii, she is shocked and tells beta how can u only wear underwear and come on the TV. But I am telling for her don’t worry; even big stars are doing ads like this. And when all will see me on TV, then I will be famous and get many girls. So I dress my best and go for the audition screening. Mummiji is also gone to temple to pray that I get this ad.

When I enter the studio, there are many guys waiting over there who are also coming for audition. Some are looking ok, but me DJ is always looking the best. I sit on sofa and wait for receptionist to call my name. Another boy is also sitting on the sofa. He is coming little close and asking me what is my name and if I am coming for audition, I say yes. Then he is talking to me about how he has done so many ads and can get me some ads also. He tells why we don’t meet for coffee. I am thinking why he is asking like date? But I want to do the ads, so I say ok and give for him my number. Then receptionist calling his name and he goes in. Then another boy is coming near my side and talking to me, he asks if I know about the boy who has just gone in. I am telling no, then he is telling me that the boy who was just talking to me is gay. Arre baba, I am so shocked. I am baba not like that, I like for girls and now I am very worried and nervous that so many gay boys are around me.

It is Valentine’s Day and I am all by myself, sad and lonely. I am not having any girlfriend and all my friends are going out with their raani. But I cannot go out of house also as I have told all friends that I am going on date with pretty girl today as I am not wanting them to laugh at me because I am alone. So I am sitting at home with mummiji and daddiji. Then someone is ringing door bell and I am going to see who has come. There is delivery boy and he gives me flowers, chocolates and cards. I am surprised but I cannot tell for you how happy I am. At last I will get a Valentine.

Then delivery boy says sign for the gifts, but the name is wrong, there is some Amit Kumar written. I ask delivery boy why name is wrong. So he tells name is right, the gifts are for Amit Kumar. And then he asks what my name is? I tell it is DJ. Then he is snatching all gifts from me and saying oh, very sorry mistake became wrong; this is for your neighbor Amit Kumar. I am so sad that I am feeling like crying. I get angry for him and tell him to get lost. Bloody idiot. I go and sit in my room and watching TV. All the channels are showing about love, girlfriends & boyfriends and all this. I am fed up. I decide I will put my profile on matrimonial site and then I will definitely get some girl. Any girl will be fine, even not pretty one, even chubby or little dark types is fine. After all as I am hearing my friend say something is better than nothing. So by next Valentine I am 100 percent sure that I am not going to be all alone again and tomorrow I am also going to temple and putting 100 rupees donation for God and asking that my raani will come soon in my life. I know God will grant my wish soon. 

Today was the day that I became a star – a Bollywood star! What totally awesome time I am having today. Best it was. So I went in morning to studio all set for the stardom. First make up girl put all makeup on me like foundation and all. She is cute. She even put some lipstick. I was telling, ‘arre kya kar rahi hai?? Mad or what?” Then she was telling that all stars also put the makeup and the lipstick. So then I say ok. After makeup is done then I am looking very good yaar. I have chai and all and then change into first set of clothes – full on leather, boots, jacket, pants, cowboy hat and all. I look damn hot yaar. Even photographer is saying. Makeup girl is checking out at me.

I am on the fire man! I am striking all the poses of Salman I see in Stardust, FIlmfare magazine and all. On my knees I went, holding hair I did, looking mean, romantic full on poses I did. Then I changed into next change – white shirt and blue jeans. More poses I shot superbly. Bu then lunch time it was and I asked makeup girl if she wants to go be going with me for the lunch. She said no but I think she is playing hard to get. Anyways good she said no coz my mummy gave me aalu ka parathas. After lunch then few more shots and then finished. I saw pictures on photographers laptop. He said he will do some work on it and send me. I really look like Salman Khan in some of them yaar! This is going to get for me lots of dates with lots of hot girls I’m the sure!

When I was leaving then I went to makeup girl and tell her that I wants to take her out for coffee as thank you to her. She says no need to thanks but I insist. So she say she busy but give me her phone number to call another time! I am the scoring boss! Full day went superb! Only things is that I went home and tried to call number she gave but some old man on the phone was there saying wrong number every time. Dunno why…